I have a lot of anger issues because I felt so useless and defenceless as a kid


Coming up to 3 months ago I tried taking my own life on a Wednesday night, on the Friday morning one of my mates asks me to play for his team and I can honestly say this is one of the things that is keeping me mentally healthy and it's now a top priority in my life. 

 

My early years - at 18 I found out the reason I'd been having this same nightmare 3 or 4 times a week sometimes more was because when I was 3 years old I was beaten by a 'guardian' of mine. This nightmare was so scary for me I would wet the bed until I was 11. 

 

I know this has affected me badly and I probably don't know just how bad but I think I have a lot of anger issues because of this because I felt so useless and defenceless as a kid.



When I was 22 I started lifting weights and reading about training and 'doing it properly' and after doing it for almost 2 years I signed up to compete in powerlifting. One guy had said that I was really nervous all of the time and powerlifting allowed me to release all of that energy and that was why I was so strong. So I signed up, got through the Squats fine, next up Bench Press my nemesis, I got disqualified.


They are really strict on certain rules and I broke them 3 times in a row. So I got DQ'd but I carried on and got a 200 kg Deadlift in spandex. I went back again a few months later as a part of a team competition and did really well. Without realising I had qualified for The Regional North West Championships.

 See Marcus' YouTube Video here 


It was incredibly close between me and this other guy. Just after I finished my final Deadlift I went and sat next to my girlfriend and then the announcer calls 'all lifters to come to the stand.' They start handing out certificates

 

I look on and read it Marcus Morris 74kg total: 462.5 kg

 

Position: 2nd. 'What I came 2nd?' I said to myself out loud.

 

I couldn't believe it and this was a major moment for me personally I'd finally started to realise I am actually good at stuff.

 

 Read Marcus' full article here 


 






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